ARG >{

Furious. OMG I don't scream because I'm not 3years old to throw a tantrum and well aware it won't make me feel better. Kicking/punching someone in the face/violently between the legs will. And it may land me in a cell with a lady named Bubba trying to hit on me. So blogging will do.Hey, not all entries will be funny or happy.


Just spoke to someone in a way I never thought I would. Everyone has their breaking point. Disappointment is something I will never get used to especially from a repeat offender. Hardship, however, is something I refuse to grow accustomed to, no matter how persistent it is. There are endless unconventional things-both simple and complicated-about my family that I will strive to never mimic, adopt nor incorporate into my future family dynamics. I just wish some people would understand the gravity of their decisions and actions on their family members and the large contribution they make to the construction of characters and personalities.

Take a minute to de construct one aspect of your personality and I bet you can probably link it to family history. For instance, I'm mature for my years because my childhood was short lived. With that said, I'm probably as silly as I am for the same reason. Bitter sweet.

Funny how negative this post sounds. The more I interact with the elderly, the more I feel the need to repair/maintain relationships with family members. Ultimately it is they who are forced to stick through the tough times even if they are to blame for trouble. Loneliness sucks now when everyone is around and young, I don't even want to imagine how lonely it must feel to be old, frail and without family. I'm truly blessed in many ways to have the life and family I do aaaand things are not always what they seem.

Because I have such little patience with family, I pray for patience. Lord knows I need it.

Good night
~Jai