KidZ

Many things on my mind.

First, I've noticed, at the risk of sounding redundant, that children of color plagued by poverty in NY don't get the chance to be children.

**this is not to minimize or in any way take away from the very adult like situations they are exposed to: abuse, domestic violence, criminal exposure, financial strain, broken homes etc etc.

But allow me to process my thoughts...

I'll gear this toward females since its what I'm most exposed to. With sickening frequency, I witness too many little girls/adolescents wearing too much make up and not enough clothing, their immature minds trying to catch up with women-type issues and situations, idolizing everything except education, accomplished women and hard work. Not experiencing honesty-ever.

Talkin, actin, like they grown, but ask them to pronounce pizza or to mention the last book they read that wasn't from the Zhane series-its like someone pushed the mute/corny button. For example, my 14 year old, light skinned, waist length pocahontas type hair dominican intern has a nick name for african americans: "changas, because the look like chimpanzees". *cringes. This church going bright 14 year old never walked into my office without eye liner and matching jordans. SMH.

Or how about my 14 year old witty cousin who had the abortion and gets drunk @ parties, and hates "black girls cuz black girls hate her?"

Or what about my 18 year old cousin who graduated high school almost 2 years ago and has made no other moves?

Pero ask them wat omegas new song is and who isn't talking to who on the block.

Oh...and GOD 4bid I speak properly around them "why u actin so white?!"

What about the 15 three-12 year olds hanging on my stoop till dawn...all the time?!!?

Why is it that the more educated u become it feels like the less u can identify with your people? Lemme try to get them to read "infidel" or to the enjoy a day @ the museum unless there's papis there.

What is the determining factor to induce development among people like my cousins and the youth I encounter in my hood 24/7 so that they snapp outta the poverty mind set/ behavior?

What made me socially conscious and my sister mad ignorant toward other cultures and society: "eso cocolo! Yo no me meto con uno!"

Why after being educated am I much more judge mental of them? Because all of the above were judgments. What makes me expect more of them?

What happened to playing dolls and following rules? What happened to not shaving/doing your eye brows until 15 or older? What happened to curfews, asking permission and castigos when rules were broken? What about acting your age and holding on to your youth?

It makes me sad to see wasted potential and little adults. Maybe spending more time with them will help me understand? Let's try that one day mengggg.

Anyway, much more on this topic but ill leave it at that, I hope to blog one day with more answers than questions.

~for da' kidz!
~Yo