Bachkahhhh

in the mood for randomness due to the randomness that surrounds me....

so i was walking to the gym and a homeless person (i really hate it when they are referred to as bums, as if they are no longer human cuz they smell and live on the street) pulled down their pants and proceeded to urinate all over the sidewalk. WOW..i wanted to die laffin but then I wudda looked crazy.

some guy busted his ass on the treadmill. i laffed.

my 2 year old nephew found my eyeshadow n thought my white bedsheets needed a "smokey eye" look. :x

recently my mind has been OD active. I caught myself having an active conversation with ME...in public! now dont get me wrong, I def talk to myself, but to loose my crazy in public? thats just outta my character, must've been someone important...

it's interesting how I react to men that are genuinely romantically interested AND sweet. apparently those men do exist- go figure! i have to admit...im jaded. im almost compelled to justify that statement by attaching the laundry list that has led me to my current state, but i'll leave that to your imagination. what is evident-to my surprise- is that my hearts been damaged and is now more guarded than Alcatraz in 1934. its not the typical guarding tho. its diff, odd, weird and inexplicable. which throws me off guard. im good at pin pointing these things out and addressing the issue allowing myself to moving forward. this concept of being jaded is new and unknown...i guess its inevitable, just like the innocent bystanders that will fall victims to it. i apologize in advance.

hey i cant help it and neither can many of my friends, male or female. I've seen it more powerfully in females tho..i wonder why. To many, TRUST is a 5 letter word in the english language. punto.

that doesn't mean i won't take the risk though. What's life without a little adventure and risk? U must be outta ur mind if u think imma volverme una poopoo n be defeated. Im def not a "ill never trust again" type of person. I say BRING IT...roll with the punches, and learn from the knockouts. MY trust system is in place with constant upgrades. u can thank many a-wack people. & hey if ur honest, u have nothing to worry about. dont get too comfy tho, they dont call me hawk eyes for nothing. amazing what people do when they think they are not being watched.

still too early to tell but 09 feels different (knock on wood).

stay vigilant
cambio y fuera!