
"Its about how you make a person feel"- This statement made by DJ struck me like Mami's chancleta across the side of my head because my sister and I were bickering over la barbie. Interestingly, it served the same purpose: it made me think.
I attended a party with my best friend in Jersey a few days ago and one of my acquaintances stops in his tracks, looks at me like a fat kid does cake and said "You are the most perfect 23 year old with a masters and everything else...mmm." Not used to such direct compliments I flashed an uncomfortable smile and said right, tell me that when you're sober. His reply, " Absolutely."
The morning after there's a text: "You are going to make a man extremely happy one day."
Now that's what I'm talking about! Nope, not what he said, but what he did. This person seems to think that I'm important enough to follow through with a drunken promise. That regardless of whether I'm interested or not, this person made me feel special by taking the time to keep his word.
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Its interesting that this person did not forget the convo as I thought he would, did not use the "I was drunk excuse," or that although we had exchanged info in past and never used it, he kept his word.
Makes me think of all the minor details I pay attention to that tend to be overlooked by many. Here are a few examples.
-My friend's boyfriend is off for the day, he went to her house to pick something up before she leaves for work, she says I'm about to walk out lets grab some coffee, and although he hasn't seen her for a few days, is already at her place, is walking the same direction as she is (coffee is on the way), and has abosulutely nothing to do HE SAYS NO.
-Saying you will call back and don't.
-Wishing someone a good day and receiving no reply.
-Saying you will do something and not doing it.
-Not acknowledging a job well done.
-Falling asleep midway through a text convo (I'm guilty of this one in particular).
I'm sure many examples come to mind...go ahead share...
These actions are frequent and they leave an emotional impression. How do you think people feel when the aforementioned occurs? That's what they remember. And this isn't applicable to just relationships. What I'm talking about seeps into all areas of life: work, school, family, etc. Frequent events that don't go unnoticed by me. Some may be overlooked but all are definitely filed into my mental note brain cabinet. Boggles my mind how some people prefer not to inconvenience themselves to make other people feel good (happy, special, worthy, important, loved etc etc etc.). And it really Maybe they are not thinking about the other person...just themselves? What's wrong with being considerate? Is it perceived as a weakness? Perhaps threatening even? Does your consideration increase with interest? Why not just be considerate?
I say it's a reflection of a person's character naturally narrating different things of different people.
Maybe it's because I am this way, but I enjoy people that go out of their way to make others feel good. I don't do it to impress anyone or expect it in return but when it's chronically goes without reciprocation, its like a slap in the face. It's so distasteful when your inconsiderate, like putting your hand in the jelly bean bag without looking and putting one in your mouth expecting deliciousness only to find that you've bitten into the black jellybean...an unhappy moment that makes you not want to put your hand in the bag again.
So I challenge you friends . First evaluate and see if you are considerate or not. Get feed back to ensure consensus on considerateness (I made that word up :) ). Secondly, pay attention to detail and follow through! And lastly, I challenge you to make someone else feel good. It doesn't take much money or thought- call someone you haven't spoken to in a while, send someone a funny email or buy someone a glass of wine because they had a rough day...do something! Karma will reward you.
Pausa Y Volvemos!!!
UV
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
I don't stress the little things but I'm big on DETAIL...
Posted by ItWontMakeSense at 1:42 PM
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1 comments:
It seems the word consideration is a theme in our lives lately. As I said before, maybe what need is to rid ourselves of ppl that don't know how this word works in true friendship...
and I am all smiles to see I was quoted. Cheetos.
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